Missing You

I miss my human! She's in America looking for somewhere for me and her to live. I hope she finds somewhere with plenty of trees and lamp posts! I've just found out they have snakes over there that slither along in long grass and bite you when you frighten them. I hope she doesn't expect me to go running about in the grass like I do at home. I've never met a snake but they don't sound very nice.

On the plus side I'm staying with Brandy again. We went to the beach at the weekend which was ace. I had a splash around in the sea and then we had a BBQ - mmmmm sausages!

T minus 1 month

Yeah that's it - only a month until I go to the land of the free - although the amount of money my human seems to be forking out to US officials it's not so free. 

I need to put a list together of the things I want to take.  How many toys will I need?  I hope she gets a place where I can lie on the sofa - I don't want to compromise my lifestyle.

Still no idea where I'm going to live - I hope it's somewhere where I can run around - it's so boring being on a lead all the time.

I'm trying not to think about all the dogs and people I'll miss.  At times it doesn't seem like such a good idea to leave my comfort zone but it's a good opportunity for my human and it's only 6 months which will fly by.

We still need to work out the issue with my prison cell.  I think she thinks I've forgotten about it as my toys aren't being thrown in any more but it's still there and I guess if I want to go with her I'll have to get used to it

Sleepover

My human had to go to London really early the other day so I had a sleepover next door.  It was brilliant.  Don't tell my human but I get spoilt so much when I stay there.  I got to sleep on the sofa all night and more walks than my little legs are used to.  Don't get me wrong I love going for walks but I need my beauty sleep as well.  I think I've caught up on my sleep now.  

We went to the park and then to town.  It was market day and the butcher was there.  It's cruel putting all the meat within sniffing distance.  I just about managed to resist jumping up and snaffling a rather large fillet steak that was balanced on the edge of the table.  

I'm really going to miss them when I go to America.   Do they have custard creams in America?

Holiday

I went on holiday last week.  We went in a big plastic box that follows her car - I think it's called a caravan.  I know lots of people laugh about them but I love it.  I get a bed all to myself and best of all the humans have BBQ's every evening which means SAUSAGES!  

We stayed at one of my favourite places in the woods where I can run around without being on a lead.  There were loads of other dogs there and my best mate Brandy was there all week as well.  I had such a good time.   It was really sad though because I don't think I'll be seeing Brandy again this year.  I hope he doesn't forget me.

Got it!

Yeah!  I've got my passport.  My antibody test was positive which means I got a passport.  That's mine there.  I'm going to have great fun with my human when she tries to get a photo from one of those little booths.  I wonder if I'll look like a criminal like she does in her passport photo. Is it a special filter they use to make the photos look so bad?

I don't think it will be long before we leave.  I've heard her talking about June which in doggie time is really, really soon.  I'm still winning on the prison front.  I reckon she's ignoring it so she'll think I'll forget about it and then magically go in it when she tells me to.  Dream on!

Rescued

Ah ha!  I've rescued my toy and ate the custard creams!  It doesn't mean I've given in - I snook in the prison when my human had gone to the shops.  You should have seen the look on her face when she got back and I greeted her with my toy.  Hee hee.

Feeling Blue

I've been a bit depressed lately.  It was Easter which meant a) my human was at home all day and b) my best mate Brandy came to stay.  He's gone home now and my human is back at work, which means I'm all alone again - with just Terry Wogan for company.  

And to make matters worse my favourite toy is being held captive! Look you can see him in the photo.  My human threw him right to the back of my prison and I refuse to go in and get him.  She's trying all forms of "persuasion" as she calls it to get me in there but so far I've managed to resist. Of course Brandy let me down when he arrived at Easter.  My human had left custard creams in the prison to tempt me in.  I was just about holding out, due mainly to an ample supply being fed to me over the fence from our neighbours.  So anyway, Brandy arrived, walked straight into the prison, ate the biscuits and then settled down for a nap.  Traitor!  I don't know how long I'll be able to keep this up though - my human is starting to lose her patience - she tried pushing me in when I wasn't paying attention. Luckily I'm still quick on my paws and managed to make a quick getaway.   

Forgiveness

I give in. I can't keep this sulking up, not when my human is so nice to me. The day after the visit to the vets she took me out in the car to meet my favourite human children. I've known them ever since I was a puppy. Wendy is the eldest and she has two brothers George and Tom who were born together which, apparently, is special with humans. I can't see what all the fuss is - my mum had 9 of us all at the same time.

We all went for a really nice walk and I had loads of treats. I kept having to sit down and shake a paw but it's worth it. I had a great time. They don't live near us any more which is a shame because I do miss them.

So I'm friends again with my human and back to sleeping in the same room as her. I'm still not going in that kennel though!

Ow, ow, ow, ow!

Vet - again! He shaved off some fur on my leg then stuck a needle in me. Ow, ow, ow! Not even a nice walk and 3 sausages is going to make me forgive my human for a few days.

Let's just say we'll be sleeping in different rooms tonight.

What the?

OK, I'm guessing the trip to the States is back on. My human has bought me a 'present' - note the quotes there... I don't think it's much of present. Yesterday she struggled into the house with a huge plastic kennel. She put my bed in it and then spent the rest of the afternoon trying to get me inside it. It's fantastic fun. She puts a line of treats leading up to and into the kennel, I happily eat all the treats within reach without going in, genius! She's now resorted to throwing my toys into the kennel. At first they were just at the door, then a little bit further meaning I had to stretch and now my toy parrot is lost in the kennel for good. I'm not going in there. She threw the parrot in, she can get it out!

I know what her next plan will be - sausages - she knows I can't resist them. I wonder how quick I can get in, eat the bate and then out again?

Atta Boy

I must have been a good boy this week because I had two fantastic treats. On Monday I went for a walk with Bobby and Cindy two of my best doggie mates. Cindy loves playing fetch with her Frisbee - although she has this really strange habit of bringing it back to my human and then not letting go of it, even though she's desperate for someone to throw it. Very odd for a 'clever' dog. I think Bobby and I are cleverer; if the human throws it they should go and get it. Poor Bobby is suffering a bit now - he's got arthritis, so has a limp. He still tries to run around like he used to but suffers a bit later.

My second treat was staying at Lyn and Roger's. They are my favourite human friends (family aside of course). They take me for walks when my human is too busy to bother with me and, best of all, they feed me human biscuits - custard creams to be precise, not those boring mini-boneo's I usually get. Don't tell anyone but when they see me in the garden they come out and give me biscuits over the fence: it's brilliant! Some mornings I hang around in the garden in the hope they see me and come out with food. I'm such a charmer when I want to be.

Woof neighbourhood

I was thinking the other day how lucky I was to live in a neighbourhood where all the dogs are nice to me. Then within 24 hours I get grumped at by 3 different dogs. Don’t worry I’m alright! My defence is cowardice. I lie down meekly and they tend to leave me alone. My human wading in with her big boots also tends to help. It was a bit scary through.

The first one was a boxer who I’ve never seen before. We were near the end of our morning walk; I was on the lead, then out of nowhere springs this dog. Before I could get my ‘big wus’ defence in play (lie down meekly and pray I don’t get hurt) he’d pinned me to the floor and was growling menacingly at me. Luckily my human was on hand to ‘rescue’ me and then the two humans had words. Apparently the boxer was ‘only playing’ – yeah right.

We met Taz on our evening walk that same day. I don’t know what type he is but he’s got a squashed nose and a big fluffy tail. He barks all the time. He always grumbles at me but I just ignore him now. He’s always on the lead so I run past him as fast as I can making sure I’m just out of reach – hee, hee.

The latest incident was much more frightening. I think his name is Doug. He’s an Australian cattle dog with an attitude problem. Maybe he’s forgotten that we used to play together when he was a puppy because I swear he tried to kill me. Thank fully he was on his lead and his human didn’t stand for any nonsense. He must be a strong dog though because his human had to pretty much sit on him so we could get past. I don’t think I’ll shed any tears over him when I go to America.

I’ll introduce you to my friends next time.